Shifting Perspectives: Overcoming Negative Bias in Coaching
From The Heart
Shifting Perspectives: Overcoming Negative Bias in Coaching
Have you ever noticed that we as human beings tend to focus more on the negative things, we encounter than the positive?
Case in point: My son is taking a speech class this semester as part of the course requirements for his degree in Engineering. Luckily his time in Parochial Schools and his leadership positions in the Navy practically insure him an A in this class. The first assignment was a 5-minute introduction on himself. As suspected, he received an A on the assignment and the feedback from his classmates was very positive. Except for one. One person out of 28 said he was not clear, and he said “Um” too many times. When I asked how his speech went, he said, “Well, I got some really negative feedback”. Rather than saying, "I got a 100 on the assignment", or “27 of my classmates said I was a great speaker.” His attention went to the 1 negative bit of feedback he got from one person. Not to pick on him, because this is something we all do.
Negative bias is real, and it is here to stay. Neuroscience tells us that we, as humans, are hardwired to pay attention to the negative aspects of everything in our environment as a way of being sure we are safe. We size up the situation, look for what is negative, take it in, and then process our way to what is positive.
When we are working with our clients, it is a good idea to keep negative bias in mind. Listen for them actively and ask questions about them as you hear them. Your client’s initial perspective and information that they are giving you may be the downside of things. We can partner with them to ask questions about the other side of the situation to get them to look at all the possibilities.
When we are working on ourselves and our businesses, it is important to remember this as well. At first glance, things may seem impossible. Things may seem unreasonable. We may take the negative piece of “constructive feedback” to heart and completely ignore what we did well. It is important for us to move into the role of the observer of ourselves when we get stuck on the dark side and keep moving towards the light or at least a nice balance.
Embrace negative bias as a clue of what is important to you and to your clients. Keep in mind that we live from our own perspective and that all we can see is relative to what we bring to the table. Be sure you are counterbalancing negative bias with at least a 3 to 1 ratio. Some psychologists say it is 5 to 1 that sets the scales to balance. So, be sure you are feeding your brain positive thoughts to counterbalance negative input.
What would it take for you to notice your own negative bias and to listen for the negative biases your clients are showing up with, without judging them as wrong or bad? What would it take for you to counterbalance your negative bias reactions? After all, it is all good, even when it’s not.
With love,
Jille
Upcoming Events
333 (Third Thursday at 3 p.m.)
(CLOSED) September 20th, CoachPath hosts a monthly Q&A Open Mentor Coaching Session with Jille and Dana. Bring your Marketing, Skills and Personal Development topics to our call and ask away. The session will be hosted on Zoom and we look forward to working with you to move you forward in your development as a Coach.
Just another way for us to give back. Register once at the link above to be on the reminder list each month.
CoachPath Core Competency Connection Group for Coaches
(CLOSED) FALL IN LOVE WITH THE CORE COMPETENCIES. Our next session begins Monday, October 1st at 5 p.m. ET. This group is for Coaches who are serious about taking their skills to the intermediate and advanced levels, need Mentor Coaching Hours or CCE’s.
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(CLOSED) Begins on Thursday, September 20th at 9a.m. ET. Join Dana for a 7-week business building boot camp to build your client numbers and business impact. How do you want to finish this year? Put the work in and have fun in a supportive environment.
Industry News
ICF’s latest Milestone
Just five years after the International Coach Federation (ICF) awarded its 10,000th credential to a Leadership Coach in New Zealand, the world's largest coaching organization has surpassed another credentialing milestone. Last week, Alexandra Claes, an Executive Coach currently based in Germany, earned her Associate Certified Coach credential and became ICF's 25,000th credential-holder.
"ICF is proud of the professional standards that we developed and uphold. It is a great pleasure to welcome Alexandra as our 25,000th credentialed coach! The growth of the number of ICF Credential-holders has been unprecedented, and so has the growth in demand for coaches who hold these credentials. I want to congratulate all ICF Credential-holders for choosing to invest in themselves and their careers by earning and maintaining an ICF Credential. This is also a moment to celebrate the hundreds of ICF volunteers and staff members whose efforts made reaching this milestone possible," ICF CEO/Executive Director Magdalena Nowicka Mook said.
ICF launched its credentialing program in 1998, initially awarding credentials to 34 individuals who had helped pioneer the then-nascent coaching profession. Since then the coaching industry has evolved dramatically, and ICF's credentialing program has grown and evolved in tandem. In the past decade, the number of ICF Credential-holders has grown by more than 400 percent, and the ICF Credential has secured its position as the only globally recognized credential for professional coaches, with ICF Credential-holders living and
working in 119 countries.
In the weeks ahead, ICF will invite members of the global coaching community to celebrate this milestone on social media by taking a selfie with a glass of their favorite beverage and sharing it with the hashtag #ICFToasts25K. ICF will also share more details about Alexandra Claes and her journey to earning an ICF Credential.
The International Coach Federation (ICF) is dedicated to advancing the coaching profession by setting high ethical standards, providing independent certification and building a worldwide network of credentialed coaches across a variety of coaching disciplines. ICF is active in representing all facets of the coaching industry, including Executive, Life Vision and Enhancement, Leadership, Relationship, and Career Coaching. Its 29,000-plus members
located in more than 135 countries work toward the common goal of enhancing awareness of coaching, upholding the integrity of the profession, and continually educating themselves with the newest research and practices.
I am Grateful For: My Cousin Lauren
This past January, a 2nd cousin of mine named, Lauren, who I had never met before, reached out to me on Facebook messenger to ask me about a Life Coaching Program that was in her area. She was asking me to check it out and see if it was any good and something I thought might help her with certain aspects of her life. After checking it out and noticing that the coach was an ICF Professional Coach, I gave the program a nod. Lauren went to the program, learned a lot and enjoyed the benefits of being part of a group coaching program.
The bigger picture is that because of her willingness to reach out and ask for help, she and I have grown incredibly close in just a few short months. She is like connecting with my long-lost sister who I never knew I had. She and I chat, text, call and zoom almost every day. In fact, she and her two kids, Maddi and Cash came to Florida to visit us this summer. We had a great time and it served to make our connection and the connection of our two families even stronger.
AND she has decided to become a coach taking her time to finish her degree, become professionally trained and attending events and classes as she can. In fact, she attended a vision board workshop given by the fabulous Jenny Remington, just this past weekend. She is a joy to have in my life and we look forward to her being a partner in my business in the years to come. Thank you, Lauren.
Here is a photo of Lauren, Maddi and Me at the beach on Captiva Island this past July.
Original email sent 9/2018
